Discovering Feelings
by Dyslexic CSI
Summary: Sarah MacKenzie is having a little trouble figuring out how she feels for a certain Commaner Harmon Rabb. sucky summary, the story is better


**Disclaimer:** I own nothing of this creation

**A/N:** My first attempt at a JAG fic, though I have written a few for NCIS and Law and Order SVU. Read and review.

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Discovering Feelings

Mac stood in the centre of the rooftop landing, hugging her trench coat closer into her body in an attempt to keep the chilly breeze from freezing her small body and turning her into an icicle. She was happy to get away from the crowd for a while and the cool air was refreshing on her face, even though the wind was stinging her eyes. She preferred being out here, rather than being hit on by the not so attractive men inside, or well that was the excuse she settled on.

What she really needed was a breather from the close contact she was sharing with a certain, devastatingly handsome, Commander Harmon Rabb Jr. "Damn Mac," she thought to herself, "you guys have been working together for a long time now. This has to stop; you cannot still be feeling like that. You're not in high school anymore Mac, you don't do crushes anymore - you need to put an end to this really soon – before it gets out of **your** control," she said to herself.

She and Harm were partners, friends, co-workers – they were nothing more than that and it would not have helped her to think any differently. Sure, they flirted shamelessly and Harm was almost always the first one to start throwing the innuendos at her, and she being quick-witted and sharp-tongued always responded with a good comeback. However, this… this was crossing all boundaries and not to mention putting their friendship at risk if it didn't work the way she wanted it to. Not that she had any intention of turning what they had into something more, but the thought certainly did cross her mind.

Even in the dark, cold outside, she could feel her ears and cheeks burn up with colour and she had no doubt that had anyone been standing across her and looking at her, they would have seen the blush creep up her neck, cheeks and ears. Being a marine, she had learnt to hide her feelings and emotions very well, but the reaction she got when she thought about Harm and the implications of turning it into a 'something more' always sent her blood pressure sky-rocketing and her heart thumping wildly in her chest, which thankfully was held in place by her ribcage and lungs.

Therefore the only thing she could do to prevent herself from having heart palpitations earlier was that she excuse herself from the group inside and come out here for a breath of fresh, icy cold air. Well what else could she have done when the object of her affection and her nightly fantasies had asked her to dance with him in a room crowded with people from the JAG HQ? There was a much easier solution, though she would never have used it. She had given up drinking a long time ago and she was damned if she had to go down that road again.

Inside the restaurant earlier.

So there she stood – her heart banging against her chest wall and her stomach full of butterflies waiting for her courage to gather itself up and make its presence known in her head, so that she could at least share one dance with this distinguished man, who was patiently waiting for her to accept his dance invitation, his hand outstretched in her direction.

She unconsciously reached her hand out to his, placed her hand in his and entwined their fingers. This was unfamiliar territory and she knew just how much this one dance was going to torture her night after long night. This was a very bad idea and despite knowing the repercussions that were going to follow her heart had already made the decision for her, as her mind had been rendered invalid from being in such close contact with him.

They swayed to the music that the band was playing, the small smile on Harm's lips and the twinkle in his eye, caused Mac's heart to speed up. She was not sure how much longer she was going to last if the band kept up with the slow music. She needed a bit of space from him, as this was too close for comfort. How could he not notice the nervousness she had been feeling all night? He had to have some idea of the reaction he had caused her to have.

It was when the tempo and rhythm to the last song had changed to a slow sensual tune; Mac had decided that enough was enough. There was only so much her tortured little mind and body could take and she immediately untangled herself from Harm's grip, excused herself and hurriedly excused herself from the dance floor and made a dash for the peace and quiet of the outside of the restaurant. That was where Harm had found her fifteen minutes later.

Now: Outside on the rooftop.

She felt him before she heard him. "Maybe it was marine instinct," she tried to reason with herself, but she knew better. She and Harm were so in sync that she felt him or better his presence before she even heard him, and this was one of those times. She could sense his mood and read his thoughts before he voiced what was on his mind.

He walked up to her and stood behind her, leaning against her back. "Hey," he smiled at her and once again, her heart skipped a beat or three. Did he realise this was going to cause her to have sleepless nights for a long time to come? Did he realise she already had trouble sleeping, because all she saw when she closed her eyes at the end of a long day was his sparkling eyes and addictive smile? She felt his breath cascade down the back of her neck and she shivered with anticipation.

"Shall we continue our last dance here?" he asked softly and she turned around to look at him, a confused expression on her face. "Well you just ran out during the last dance so I figured you owe me the last dance," he said seriously. He was still invading her personal space and it did not look like he was going to back away anytime soon, well not until they had the last dance anyway.

"There's no music," was the only excuse she could come up with, to avoid being pressed up to him for a little while longer. He moved closer to her and removed her coat, only to display the revealing dress she was wearing. He could not take his eyes off of her and she knew this was going to be the 'death of her'.

Her breath hitched as he placed one hand on her head and with the other placed securely around her waist, he pulled her closer into him, annihilating the already miniscule distance between them. "Listen," he whispered as he placed her ear to his chest, and she heard the steady beat of his heart. "Do you need any more than that?" he asked as he started moving his feet, leading her as he had done inside. She could not help it and instead of fighting him, she simply let him lead her and she followed, enjoying the feeling of being in his arms.

Her heart had again started to thump in her chest and her head swirled as she breathed in is scent and let her insides turn to mush. This was as close to a date she was going to have with Harm, so she had better make the best of it," she though to herself. It seemed the same thoughts were running through his mind as well, but he was not as undecided as she was. He made the first move.

He moved his hands from where they were, and brought them to her cheeks and tilted her dead up to face his. Slowly he traced the outline of her lower lip with his thumb and he felt her shudder. In an instant, he brought his head down to hers and met her lips in a slow movement, preferring to explore his options before going in for the big kill. He kissed her slowly and let all the doubt he knew she had, melt and disappear into the ground before he deepened the kiss.

They parted due to an oxygen deficit in their lungs and when Mac looked up at her best friend she knew she would not be spending any more lonely nights in her apartment. Oh, no. much had change in the last ten minutes and she was happy about it.

"Why don't we call it a night and head home to your apartment marine?" he asked with a roguish glint in his eye.

"I'd say that is a good idea flyboy! she teased him but entwined her hand with his as she led him toward the exit of the building.

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So thats the first attempt. 

Leave a little something behind for me to read as well please.

thanks and have a great weekend

hellraiser


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